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Make sure your kids start the school year feeling strong and confident. Don’t take old study, learning, and behavioral patterns that did not work last year into the new school year. We can help students at all levels, including elementary school, middle school, high school, and college. Our experts in study skills, learning styles, cognition, and academic achievement can help your child find easier ways of making the grades that truly reflect their abilities. Call us today and one of our experts will begin to work with you or your child before the school year begins.
Dr. Renee Clauselle, Founder, Child and Family Psychology, appeared on an episode of ABC’s “LI Viewpoint” on July 11th. On the show, Dr. Clauselle discusses Internet safety and the “Bully-Proof My Kid” program.
Pictured (left-right): Dr. Clauselle with Ken Rosato, host of LI Viewpoint.
Watch the Episode
» ABC Viewpoint (Parts I and II)
Dr. Renee Clauselle, a practicing child psychologist with a private practice in Franklin Square, New York, and Director of School Mental Health Services at St. John’s University, will be one of three speakers attending the “Legal Aspects of Managing Autism Spectrum Disorders for School Districts” seminar on June 29.
Dr. Clauselle’s lecture, “Defining and Diagnosing Autism Spectrum Disorders,” will take place from 9:00 a.m. to 10:30 a.m. at The Hilton Long Island located at 598 Broadhollow Road in Melville.
The topics that Dr. Clauselle will address include the definition of autism; the difference between autism and Asperger’s syndrome; common misdiagnoses of autism disorders; medical treatment options; and the social behavior of children with high-functioning autism and Asperger’s and its effect on school performance.
Dr. Clauselle is a member of the American Psychological Association, the National Association of School Psychologists and the New York Association of School Psychologists. She is also the co-author of the article “Bender Gestalt Recall as a Measure of Short-Term Visual Memory in Children and Adolescents with Psychotics and Other Severe Disorders,” which was published in Perceptual and Motor Skills.
Registration is $299 and can be done online at www.nbi-sems.com.
Dr. Renee Clauselle, a practicing child psychologist with a private practice in Franklin Square, New York, and Director of School Mental Health Services at St. John’s University, gives tips on how to empower children and adolescents to overcome bullying.
According to Dr. Clauselle, there are certain children who are more likely to be bullied. The character profiles for victims are typically passive or submissive types. These children usually have the following characteristics:
• Cautious, sensitive, quiet, withdrawn and shy
• Are often anxious, insecure, unhappy and have low self-esteem
• May be depressed and/or obsessed with thoughts of suicide much more often than their peers
• Often do not have a single good friend and relate better to adults than to peers
• If they are boys, they may be physically weaker than their peers
• Often kids with learning or attention problems are targeted, especially if the class perceives that the teacher may not like the child
“In order to reduce your child’s chances of being victimized, it is important to help them appear less likely to be an easy target,” Dr. Clauselle said. “Helping your children with the following things — assertiveness training, problem solving, confidence and self-esteem building and resiliency training — can help.”
According to Dr. Clauselle, parents should have open conversations about various social issues with their children before any problems begin. She encourages parents to make these conversations commonplace in the home. This can be done by:
• Role playing different possible scenarios with your child and have them practice being more assertive in their response
• Have your child practice their response in front of a mirror so they are aware of their facial expressions, posture and body language
• Have your child make an audio recording of their voice so they are aware of how they sound to others. Listen with your child: Are their statements strong, believable and firm?
• Send your child to school with a “toolbox” they can use to solve or negotiate social concerns
• Make sure your child knows when to get an adult involved
• Show off your problem-solving and negotiation skills by modeling for your child an appropriate, respectful, but assertive way of dealing with a social issue
“Parents should be very involved in making their children resilient, self-confident people but they should also teach their children to stand up for themselves without being overly aggressive,” Dr. Clauselle said.
If parents or children need more help in overcoming social abuse, Child and Family Psychology, located in Franklin Square, New York will be holding Assertiveness Training and Confidence Building workshops for children, tweens and teens. Please go to www.psychologists4kids.com and sign up for the “Bully-proof My Kid” workshops. Additionally, a parent series will be offered to parents looking to build resiliency and confidence in their children.
In last month’s news, Dr. Renee encouraged parents to begin doing cyber-duty and to take the cyber-pledge. This month, she discusses a creative way for parents to do cyber-duty on social networking sites.
Of concern to many parents is that their children might follow the ground rules spelled out in their cyber-pledge, while at home, but may not do so when they have access to electronic devices outside of their parents’ immediate sight. The good news is that social networking sites can be used to enhance a parent’s ability to do their “cyber-duty.” Here is a list of how to do this:
1) Parents should have a profile on the social networking sites that their kids are on. Have fun with it. Let your kids help you make your profile.
2) Parents and children should be “friends” on sites. Most of the time, kids will not be embarrassed by this, as they typically have so many friends on social networking sites that you as the parent won’t be recognized.
3) Engage as many parents as you know to join a network of cyber-parents who have taken the pledge. Engage parents in your neighborhood, school community, churches, etc. Meet, as parents who have taken the pledge, and discuss ground rules for alerting each other when inappropriateness has occurred on the social networking sites.
Some ground rules may be:
1) All parents must have a profile on the social networking site
2) All parents must be friends of their own children and friends of as many of their friends’ children as possible
3) All parents in your group should friend each other on the social networking sites
4) All parents should surf the site at least once a day
5) Parents should devise ground rules as a group so that there are established rules governing appropriate behavior on social networking sites, that all group parents agree on AND have agreed to report to each other if one of the children disregards these rules.
6) Parents are responsible for alerting other parents (in a predetermined mode of communication) if their child has broken the ground rules
7) Parents must agree to disclose sensitive information about another parent’s child only to that specific parent, in a compassionate way
Although the above tips may seem like a lot of work, it is important for parents to remember that there is strength in numbers. For example, when many parents were children, their neighborhoods were relatively safe because the adults in the community watched over all of the children, in the neighborhood, not just their own. In fact, children were often disciplined by their neighbors. Such community involvement helped keep children safe when they were away from home. By creating cyber-communities amongst parents and children, parents can begin to make cyberspace a safer place for kids to hang out. The more parents, children, and friends that are connected on social networking sites, the easier it becomes for parents to do their “cyber-duty.”
Recently several parents have asked me questions related specifically to text messages between tween/teens. I have come across a wonderful website that I think has good information and is also an informative video that tween/teens can watch. The video can be used to open a conversation with your teen about appropriate and safe “texting”.
The website is run by the National Center for Exploited and Missing Children. The name of the video is called “Terrible Text.” Here is the link:
www.nsteens.org/videos/cyberbullying/
Teens and parents should watch it together and go over some of the suggested tips for handling hurtful text messages. Some of the suggested tips are listed below:
1. If you are being harassed, talk to parents, school administrators or local law enforcement, if you feel unsafe
2. Don’t respond to rude or harassing comments
3. Password-protect your cell phone
4. Only share your password with your parents
5. Change your password often
6. Think before sending photos or comments that can hurt you
7. If you receive negative comments or photos, do not erase them; save them for evidence, if needed
Research tells us that there are certain kids that are more likely to be bullied (traditional bullying) than others. The character profile for victims is typically passive or submissive types. These children usually have the following characteristics:
• Cautious, sensitive, quiet, withdrawn and shy
• Are often anxious, insecure, unhappy and have low self-esteem
• May be depressed and/or engaged in suicidal ideation much more often than their peers
• Often do not have a single good friend and relate better to adults than to peers
• If they are boys, they may be physically weaker than their peers
• Often kids with learning or attention problems are targeted, especially if the class perceives that the teacher may not like the child
Please read more on victims and their characteristics at apa.org/research/action/bullying.aspx (research done by Dan Olweus)
In order to reduce your child’s chances of being victimized, it is important to help them appear less likely to be an easy target. Helping your children with the following three things can help:
1) Assertiveness training (including choice of words, body language, tone of voice)
2) Problem solving
3) Confidence and self-esteem building
4) Resiliency training
First, parents should have open conversations about various social issues with their children before any problems begin. Make these conversations commonplace in your home. You can do this by:
1) Role playing different possible scenarios with your child and have them practice being more assertive in their response
2) Have your child practice their response in front of a mirror so they are aware of their facial expressions, posture and body language
3) Have you child make an audio recording of their voice so they are aware of how they sound to others (are their statements strong, believable and firm?)
4) Send your child to school with a “toolbox” they can use to solve or negotiate social concerns
5) Make sure your child knows when to get an adult involved.
6) Show off your problem-solving and negotiation skills by modeling for your child an appropriate, respectful, but assertive way of dealing with a social issue
Parents can also go to www.fishfulthinking.com to get great tips on building confident, assertive and resilient kids.
Need more help? In honor of Self-Esteem Awareness Month and Mental Health Awareness Month, Child and Family Psychology, located in Franklin Square, New York will be holding Assertiveness Training and Confidence Building workshops for children, tweens and teens. Please go to www.psychologists4kids.com and sign up for “Bully-proof My kid” by using our registration form. Don’t forget to specify that you are looking to sign up for the Bully Proof My Kid series. A parent series will be offered to parents looking to build resiliency and confidence in their children.
Upcoming Event
Child and Family Psychology presents the following workshops in honor of National Self-Esteem and Mental Health Awareness Month: Bully-proof My Kid: Empowering Children and Adolescents to Overcome Social Abuse
1) Elementary series for children Grades 1-3
2) Middle School series for children Grades 4-6
3) Tween series for children Grades 7-8
4) High School series for teenagers
5) Parent series
It is recommended that parents who enroll their children in one of these workshops also take the parent series
• Small groups, 4-5 children
• Most insurance accepted
• For more information and to sign up for a workshop, visit our website.
Sign up on the website through our registration form.
Just as parents and teachers have recess duty and watch over schoolchildren during free play, it is time for parents and teachers to also sign up for “cyber duty.” Here is how you can sign the pledge:
1. Have a conversation with your child about the world wide web, the opportunities it presents, the excitement of logging on, and the possible dangers it can invite.
2. Together with your child come up with ground rules that allow them to have fun, but also does not put them at-risk.
3. Sign the pledge as a family.
Below are two sample pledges to get you started. Sign your pledge today.
I. Sample Cyber Duty Pledge for Parents
I (insert parent’s name) promise to oversee my child’s usage of the Internet, and to make sure they follow the below ground rules:
(insert approximately 5-10 of the ground rules below.)
I also promise to let my child enjoy the Internet, as long as he/she is following the rules. I also reserve the right to call another Cyber meeting, at which point I can review, revise or change the ground rules.
_________________________________________
Signature
Download a PDF of our Cyber Duty Pledge for Parents.
II. Sample Cyber Duty Pledge for Children, Tweens, and Teens
I (insert child’s name), promise to abide by the below ground rules that I helped create with my parents:
(insert approximately 5-10 of the ground rules below.)
I understand that these rules are to protect me, my family, and friends on the Internet. I also promise to be respectful to others when using the World Wide Web. I also understand that my parents are always on Cyber Duty, and can check my computer, cell phone, or other electronic devices at any time.
_________________________________________
Signature
Download a PDF of our Cyber Duty Pledge for Children, Tweens, and Teens.
Suggested Ground Rules:
1. Have designated times when online communication is allowed.
2. Set time limits on online communication (set a timer next to the computer, ie. 45 minutes on Facebook, etc.).
3. Friends list on Facebook and other social networking sites must be approved.
4. Random checks by parents should be expected.
5. Don’t say anything in cyberspace that you would feel uncomfortable saying face-to-face.
6. No personal information (address, phone number, school, whereabouts,etc.) should be posted online.
7. Pictures to be posted must first get approval from an adult.
8. Monitor YouTube usage and what is posted on YouTube.
9. Ensure that, when children go to other’s houses, they are still responsible for the ground rules you have put in place (even if the other person does not have ground rules). It is also important that children know what the consequences are if ground rules are broken.
10. Talk to your kids about appropriate online behavior and what works for them and their friends.
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